Saturday, August 31, 2013

Days of Young

Do Bricks Age? 

Nah, they outlast civilizations ;)

So I had a birthday recently. I thought I could sneak it by my coworkers till I got to work that Friday morning where I found my cubical littered with HR-approved dollar store birthday decorations. They spare no expense at my low paying soulless corporation.

Modern day panem et circenses.

So it's your birthday this weekend huh. What you doing to celebrate?

Going to a funeral.

At least I get to suit up.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Rumble in the Ghetto

When weekend rolls around, I like to spend time watering my azaleas, tending to my precious stock market shares, oh and getting shitface-plastered.

The perfect trifecta!!
Pismo trio (L-R: Dorothy Ellis, TJ Carse by mikebaird, on Flickr
Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic License  by  mikebaird 

This particular night in question, we rolled out to Adams Ave for a little bar hoping and tomfoolery. Our group consisted of me, El Mizo, and Gambi (stands for Grown Ass Man Being Insulted). It was a good time as we downed shot after shot of fireball and got some beers in us inbetween. We then saw one of Gambi's good friends, Cici, who El Mizo was attracted to - out with two other dudes who she was taking home with her.

El Mizo proposed we follow them back to her house. "I'm down," I said. What could possibly go wrong? We bought some beer and headed down 36th to crash the menage. When we got there, I walked in the livingroom while El Mizo and Gambi went to put beers in the fridge.

I pointed to a boom box in the corner of the room and said, "oh cool, they used to call those ghetto blasters, hehe."

As it turns out, one of the dudes Cici had brought home with her was a complete and total douchebag. I knew this the minute he responded to my comment with, "yeah, and it looks like it brought the ghetto in too."

Oh hell no. You can say what you want about me - vast majority of the time I won't even give a shit, but you insult my homies and it's on, especially since Gambi is black and I wasn't sure if it was meant to be a racist comment. Either way I started tearing into this dude.

I don't know what's more white, your shirt or your skin tone.

Ahaha very funny. Say why do they call you Brick? Is it because you're as dumb as a brick?

Naw, I'm not as dumb as you look.

Good one, I'll take that as a compliment coming from you.

You should take it as a complement, cause that's about as good as it's gonna get.

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